How to have the ‘perfect life’

Have you ever heard that saying that life is what happens when you’re busy making plans? In fact, doesn’t it seem that nothing ever goes according to plan? We try to organise our work life, our social life, our relationships and our personal life. We try to take everything into account to stay on top of things and keep everybody happy. 

Yet, life always seems to throw at you that random, unexpected thing that just throws you off. Your fridge, washing machine and car break at once. You’re having problems with your boss, your landlord and your boyfriend in the same week. Or maybe you must do a public presentation and just got two zits on your nose. It feels like every time you take one step forward, life pushes you two steps back. What a mess! 

We create to-do-lists, budgets, chore charts, healthy menus and diary appointments for our social life, then decline invitations in order to stick to our plans. All in the hopes of leading orderly lives. Then why does life still not get any simpler or easier? 

How about we simply accept that life is messy and that’s okay? How about we drop that ideal of perfection that does not really exist except in our mind? Why not embrace what is happening right now, fully and completely? 

How about remembering to slow down, breathe deeply and notice the fullness of the moment? If we zoom out from our focused attention on the issue we are resisting and open up to all that is contained in this single moment, we tap into the amazing fact that there is no ‘ordinary moment.’

The sun is shining its life-giving light on earth and grass is growing without any desire to live up to anything other than what it is. Appreciate the smile of a stranger, the hug of a friend, the honour of seeing tears fall, the beauty of being human. But we tend to overlook the ordinary stuff that doesn’t make it to Instagram. 

If nobody looks closely, they won’t know you haven’t mopped the floor today. Go for a walk and enjoy nature. Play a game with friends. Show up for your family with love. These are the things that matter.

After all, it all goes by so fast! If we spend our days hoping that tomorrow will be better, years will pass in the hope that someday we will be happy, and we’ll never feel quite satisfied. There is no better time than now to switch from victimhood to playing life as it is with childlike amusement.

We do not have to miss the incredible gift we have been handed. Life is perfect in its ordinary, messy imperfection … and incredibly beautiful.

7 Tips to lead a perfectly messy but happy life 

  1. Unsubscribe from anyone or anything that makes you feel that you must live up to something.
  2. Remember that if perfection is a concept that varies from person to person, you couldn’t possibly live up to it, so why bother? 
  3. Swap the concept that life is a trap you must survive to the vision that life is a game you play.
  4. Unplug from social media and just live out your messy, beautiful, real life.
  5. Accept and love others (and yourself) fully for who and how they are without wishing them different or trying to change them.
  6. Search for the beauty within every person you meet.
  7. Swap thoughts of ‘lack’ to thoughts of ‘abundance’ – gratitude only requires a shift in focus.